Every morning, I practice a loving-kindness, or Buddhist mettā meditation. The words are always evolving in order to maintain their meaning for me. Here is a shortened version of my current mettā meditation. Note that it starts with love for oneself, often the most difficult part to get through. But, just as you can’t make a meal for a friend if you haven’t cultivated any food to have in your own kitchen, you need to cultivate self-love in order to authentically project love to others.
This version incorporates thoughts of loving-kindness for the people in the Bahamas who are suffering from the effects of Hurricane Dorian. It’s important to back up your thoughts of love with actions of love, so I have included links to ways for you to send material aid to the Bahamas.
First, I sit with a straight spine and take a few deep, slow centering breaths. Then, I say out loud or silently:
May I be happy
May I be healthy
May I ride the waves of my life
May I give and receive only loving-kindness in harmony with my true nature and the true nature of the Universe
May I live in peace no matter what comes to me
I then repeat the above line, replacing “I” with:
(Name of a family member) as in, “May (name of family member) be happy, may (name of family member) be healthy …”)
All members of my family
(Name of a friend)
All of my friends
(Name of a teacher)
All of my teachers
Some random person I saw recently (“The barista at the café,” or, “That person riding their bike,” etc.)
(Someone I had or have a conflict with)
Everyone I’ve every had any conflict with
(The town I’m in)
Everyone in (a place in the world that is in conflict, or suffering)
All beings in front of me
All beings behind me
All beings to the left of me
All beings to the right of me
All beings above me
All beings below me
All beings in me, on me, me myself, in the Earth, on the Earth, above the Earth, in the water, on the water, above the water, in the air, above the air, may all beings all beings everywhere, on all worlds, in all universes, in all dimensions, in all realities
It may seem like a lot, but you can start with fewer repetitions and work your way up. The more you feel genuine empathy for the beings you are identifying, the more satisfying a feeling you will get from the meditation.
The trickiest parts, the ones that took me quite some time until I could feel the words unconditionally as I thought or said them, were the very first: “May I be happy…” and the one for people with whom I’m in conflict. But as I practiced, it became easier. None of the meditation really works until you are able to love yourself enough to wish only good things for yourself. Love is like the light of a candle; you can’t light another candle with your flame if your own candle is not lit.
